DOMESTIC V!OLENCE

YOUR SAFETY IS MOST IMPORTANT!!!

If you feel you, your children or your loved ones are in danger please immediately contact 911

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Domestic violence first and foremost is a CRIME! and you should report it immediately!

You DO NOT deserve to be hit, forced or touched inappropriately!

Domestic violence in general is horrendous and in marriage is no exception. It is a frequent and common occurence in marriage which saddens us to say. This violence is defined as AGGRESSIVE physical abuse against or directed toward a spouse or partner.

Abuse, whether physical or emotional, can be characterized as control or force (coercion) and have patterns of behavior.

Types of physical abuse includes but not limited to:

• slapping

• scratching

• pushing or shoving

• punching

• pinching

Types of emotional abuse includes but not limited to manipulative behavior:

• criticizing

• shaming

• blaming

• embarrassing

• keeping you isolated from family or friends

Marriage is challenging, yes but under NO circumstance should it come to violence or include controlling or manipulative behavior.

Please don’t be mistaken, abuse can gradually occur and escalate over time. Subtle or small acts of aggression can lead to more severe behavior and should not be ignored.

Hoping that acts of aggression will go away does not fix the problem. Intervention may be necessary and should always be considered with domestic violence. Don’t ignore the signs!

In relationships tempers flare for various reasons that include the many stressors of life. However learning and understanding about our emotional intelligence which is the ability to handle and control our emotions is key and unfortunately this critical life skill in helping deescalate situations is one that many lack or do not practice.

Economic Abuse

This is a type of domestic abuse many may not be aware of or know is a thing. Abuse is not just physical or emotional, although this could categorize as emotional abuse but economic abuse is the controlling of finances or money. Think about it, if you have no access to money in an abusive marriage how can you help yourself? or Where can you go? This is CONTROL!

This is control with income:

• access to money and bank accounts

• bills

• spending

• borrowing

SURVIVING ECONOMIC ABUSE has more in depth info on this topic.

MARITAL RAPE

Let’s not forget marital rape. By definition “Marital rape or spousal rape is the act of sexual intercourse with one's spouse without the spouse's consent.

The lack of consent is the essential element and doesn't always involve physical violence.

Marital rape is considered a form of domestic violence and sexual abuse.”

SOURCE: WIKIPEDIA

NO IS NO in any and all circumstances! RAPE IS STILL RAPE! Even in marriage!

Approximately 10% of women have reported experiencing marital rape.

The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence (NCADV) highlights that marital rape is often underreported due to stigma and legal challenges.

MARITAL RAPE is trauma!

It does impact your mental health.

It can cause:

• PTSD

• depression

• anxiety

• and more…

PSYCH CENTRAL has more info on defining marital rape and the impacts on mental health.

NATIONAL DOMESTIC VIOLENCE HOTLINE has info on creating a personal safety plan.

HELP BELOW:

NATIONAL DOMESTIC VIOLENCE HOTINE 24/7 free & confidential support 800.799.7233, TTY 800.787.3224, chat, text 88788 available

They also have how to:

• get help

• identify abuse

• plan for safety

• and many more topics & resources

988 SUICIDE CRISIS AND LIFELINE 24/7 free & confidential support

• dial 988 (yes just those 3 numbers)

• chat available

• even though listed as a suicide lifeline, they help with ANY and all emotional or crisis you deem important

  • stress

  • depression

  • anxiety

  • relationship problems

  • substance abuse

  • etc..

OFFICE ON VIOLENCE AGAINST WOMEN:

• defines domestic violence

• has examples of abusive behavior

• how to get help

• domestic violence resources

VICTIM CONNECT weekdays 9-5 pm EST free & confidential support 855.484.2846 phone, chat, text

This is a referral helpline that helps you to:

• understand your rights and options

• emotional support

• referrals

• support in 200 languages

Please also check our NATIONAL RESOURCES page under Information & Resources for more resources for Domestic Violence.